The Once Timid Networker Is A Rock Star

As a business trainer, one of the greatest parts of my job is when I see those around me begin to grow in their careers and in their personal lives. To actually be able to be a part of their growth process and see a person begin to bloom like a beautiful rose, almost effortlessly, is one of life’s greatest joys.

Tara Schmakel

Today, one of my great friends, Tara Schmakel, will launch a new business venture–Entrepreneurial Excellence Business Forums. Tara and Frank De Raffele Jr., founder of the organization, are working together to bring the Entrepreneurial Excellence Business Forums to Minneapolis, Minnesota as an outlet for business owners to build quality relationships, gain applicable knowledge, and have a like-minded community of support.

Tara, is also the owner of the Workroom at Tara’s.  She has been sewing since a little girl with her Mother and Grandmother. After doing various needle arts for business and pleasure, she settled on sewing for the home. Her creative sewing abilities have gained her work the honor of being  displayed in ASID showcase homes, on HGTV and published in Better Homes and Gardens magazines and books, Midwest Home and Mpls./St. Paul Magazine.

As if she doesn’t have enough to do, Tara is also a BNI Director in Minneapolis. She has been working with small business owners since 2007 helping them learn to grow their business through a structured word-of-mouth marketing and referral process. In BNI, Tara is also being mentored by the organization’s founder, Dr. Ivan Misner, in The Author’s Mentoring Program where Tara is learning to better promote her business with her writing skills. The Once Timid Networker is a blog Tara has created which talks about how she was at one time a very timid networker, afraid to approach, squeemish at the thought of meeting new people. And, now she has blossomed like a rose and become one of the leaders of networking, not only in Minneapolis, but throughout the United States. Tara, has contacts around the world that she works with, consults, and helps as they work to take their businesses to new levels.

During the last three years Tara realized how much she loves helping others to achieve their goals.  The training she has done for BNI along with the one-to-one coaching she has done for small business owners in the Minneapolis area, allowed her to see not just what she enjoyed, but had a true talent for. So now, The Once Timid Networker, takes one more step forward in her business career by joining forces with Frank De Raffele, Jr., an international speaker and founder of Entrepreneurial Excellence, a weekly syndicated radio show that focuses on helping business owners by  giving them the information and educational tools they need to grow and run a more successful business.

“Tara is now taking her small business coaching and training to a different level.  As a Licensed Associate with Entrepreneurial Excellence and an Executive Chair of the Entrepreneurial Excellence Business Forums – Minneapolis, she will be able to bring world class personal and professional development to the small business  owner,” De Raffele said.

This blog post is my way of sending my best wishes to Tara in her new business venture. I am happy to call her a business associate and friend. You can view my YouTube Video “The Once Timid Networker Is A Rock Star” I created for her and then feel free to leave your congratulations notes to her in the comments section. And please feel free to share this posting, retweet the posting and share the YouTube video so we can help her promote her new business…..that’s what we networkers do best, right?

Cheers Tara. Wishing only the best for you!

Using Social Media To Gain Applicant Insight

Finding employees with good character is paramount to building a solid team. Obviously, conducting a thorough interview will assist you in gaining perspective on the applicant’s character…..as well as a thorough background check and checking references.

But have you ever considered accessing social media to help you find employees with good character…..or avoid applicants that seem to be lacking good character?

Since I do not profess to be an expert in the field of social media, I am going to point out a few practices I have noticed the “pros” use to determine if they want to have a working relationship with certain people. You can use the same information to study the habits of your applicants and see what type of messages they send out to the digital world.

Once someone accepts you as a “friend” or a contact within various social media sites, you have the opportunity to access their personal and/or professional profile. Here you will find their education, marital status, children, city of residence, place of employment and previous employers, awards they received, business recommendations, etc. Can you imagine someone giving you such a vast amount of information face to face? It would take months, even years, for you to learn most of the information about someone that you can learn by reading the various profiles throughout various social media sites! Now, don’t get me wrong, you should never base employment solely on online profiles; however, you could certainly learn many interesting characteristics of an applicant via the social media networking sites. Imagine the value of finding that an applicant is a coach for a hometown soccer team. You can tap into his team building skills he must have to be a coach to help you train members of your business team.

Here are some examples I have found from viewing various member profiles:

1)  “Just reread Bob Burg’s book “The Go-Giver.” You might want to read it too!” S. Rooks

If you are familiar with Bob Burg’s “The Go-Giver” you understand that the book is about building relationships by putting the other guy first…..be it a colleague, competitor, customer, friend, or family member. By observing that Rooks is reading a book which is focused on “giving” rather than “taking” it gives me some sense of satisfaction, as an employer, that Rooks would find the philosophy of “giving” to be a valuable characteristic to have in her personal and/or business world. That’s a great team building characteristic.

2)  “Assistant Director for one of the largest regions in the largest world-wide networking organization.” B. Anderson

By reading Anderson’s profile on LinkedIn you find that she owns OrgTrack, a web development firm. But, the posting above also shows that she holds a position with a networking organization, BNI, which focuses on building your business through referrals. Having knowledge of this could help you realize that Anderson understands relationship marketing and that she has close business relationships with other business professionals throughout the world. It could prove to be a valuable asset to your business to employee someone that is connected with other businesses world-wide!

3) “Developed a training program for other Terminal Engineers—to improve safety, reliability, and productivity.” M. Chitwood

Chitwood is the franchise owner of BNI North Alabama, a referral-based marketing company, but her profile on one of the social media sites notes that she developed a training program for a major oil company. This information would give great insight on her abilities to help you build your team through developing team building and training programs.

As you can see with these three brief notations, information from social media sites can prove to be of great value when choosing people to add to your team.

Instant information, like it or not, is here to stay. Those of you who haven’t joined in yet, better double-time and play catch up because online information will only become more and more ever-changing. Special Consideration: My recommendation is to consume as much information as you can about each of your applicants and employees via the profile sections in the various social media sites. Imagine the value of finding that an applicant is a coach for a hometown soccer team. You can tap into their team building skills to help you train members of your business team.

Being a member of social media sites, gives you the opportunity to observe an applicants’ online personality. Interviews can be nerve-wrecking to certain personality type people. Using social media gives you the platform to have small talk with someone and possibly get to know the person on a completely different level. You learn about their family, their interests, even the sports team they pull for.

SueHenryTalks, Workshop & Training Diva,  is the most knowledgeable expert on social media that I have had the pleasure of working with. Sue has been a mentor of mine for several years and she’s a no-nonsense trainer who displays a controlled, yet fun learning environment. If you would like to learn social media etiquette and understand how to build your business through the use of social media, I highly recommend you contact Sue.

Networking Is Like Swimming

The following article is a guest posting by Tara Schmakel, Assistant Director, BNI Minnesota, and author of “The ONCE Timid Networker” blog. 

It’s spring and you’re heading to the pool for the first time of the season. It’s finally warm out. No, it’s downright hot! All you can think about is getting cool in the pool! You know it will be refreshing, you will be with friends or family that you have been looking forward to spending time with and you may even lose that glow in the dark look that you’ve been sporting all winter! You’re ready to get in, but before you do, you test the waters with your toe… IT’S FREEZING. You know that you want to get in, but you can’t just “jump in” like everyone is hollering out to you. So you go back on the deck to psych yourself up!

To a lot of people networking is just like getting into that pool for the first time. It’s too cold and instead of just jumping in, they retreat for another time or until they are ready.

So what can a person do to ease into networking? Three things will help:

1. Think positive- If you think the pool is too cold, it will be. If you think the event will be intimidating, it will be. Tell yourself how great it will be and how good it will feel to have the sense of accomplishment! Just like you psych yourself to get into the pool, you can psych yourself for the event!

2. Dress for success- There are certain items of clothing that are suitable for swimming. It would be challenging to go for a dip if you were wearing a snowmobile suit. It could actually hinder your progress and weigh you down and you could even drown. If you are wearing something inappropriate for networking, you can also take a dive. Dressing according to your business is always a good idea, but many find it helpful to dress it up a notch. They find that little extra, gives them confidence, not to mention an edge over their competition. Also, don’t forget your smile. The most important accessory you could put on!

3. Be prepared- To swim in a pool, you need to have the water ready. To network at an event, you need to have your words ready. Practice what to say when someone asks you what you do. Memorize a phrase or two that will just roll off your tongue. Once you are comfortable and a person is truly interested in what you do, you will find it easy to speak from the heart. You will also find it helpful to have business cards and your calendar along!

By practicing these tips and making them your own, it will become easier to attend a function, just like easing into the pool a little at a time. However, you may find you reach a certain level of comfort that you decide to just go all the way in. Whether you become numb to the effects of your mind or just reach a level of comfort, the result will be refreshing and satisfying and you may even build some relationships and get some business!

To view more of Tara’s blog postings on how to be an effective networker visit her blog “The ONCE Timid Networker.”

Control Your Referral Flow

The following article is a reprint of a recent article written by Tim Houston, author, speaker, coach and BNI Area Director.

As an author, his work appeared in The New York Times Best Seller and multiple #1 Best Seller,  Masters of Sales, the latest book written by New York Times & Wall Street Journal authors, Dr. Ivan Misner and Don Morgan. His articles on the topic of business networking and word-of-mouth marketing have been translated and published in magazines, newspapers and blogs around the world  His first book, Level Up Networking: Produce, Profit and Prosper From Your Everyday Business Relationships, will  debut in 2010. For more information on working with Tim, visit his website at http://www.tmhouston.com.

About a year ago, I went to a local networking group. They were excited to have a new plumber in their group, (I’ll call him Artie). In talking to Artie, I found out that his business was a two man operation; he and his brother managed the business, did the technical work on each job and also did the marketing for the business. He was happy to be a part of the group which also had a general contractor, and electrician and a painter – all people who shared a similar client base As the meeting progressed, I watched this plumber get, at least, 6 referrals that day. He was very happy to be getting the referrals.

Tim Houston

Two months later, I visited the group and Artie announced that would be his final meeting. People were surprised and shocked to hear it. He explained that he was getting too many referrals - more than he and his brother could handle! It did not leave a good impression with most people as they interpreted this to mean that all he wanted to do was score a “quick hit” and move on.

Later that day, I called Artie I asked if I could speak to him about his decision. As we spoke, I told Artie that one of the biggest challenges for networkers who have a small operation – regardless of their profession – is that they can find themselves overwhelmed with receiving too many referrals. In their haste, too many make the fatal mistake of telling everyone to stop giving them referrals. They ultimately end up at a time in the future with little or no business because people assume that they no longer want referrals. In the worst case, they cut themselves off from their referral sources.

Being Artie was a plumber, I used the analogy that, just like in plumbing, you need to learn how to control the flow of referrals I explained that even in networking, just as in plumbing, there are certain “valves” or “taps” that are used with “knobs” that adjust how fast or slow the referrals will flow.

• Tell your network when to give you referrals: One October morning, George Alonso, a decorative artist and designer (www.ofhandandsoul.com) told the members of his weekly networking meeting that A good referral for him would be “a person who is looking for a decorative mural in their home or business – anytime after February!” He explained that he had too many jobs to handle at the moment but he was booking jobs for February. George knew that he had to let his network know that he still wanted referrals – just not the kind that needed his services right now. He was still keeping his pipeline full so that he didn’t experience a referral shortage once the jobs he was currently working on were completed.
• Refer your “overflow” work to someone else in your profession that you trust: If you find yourself with too many referrals, before turning away the business, talk to both the source and the person being referred and let them know that although you can’t handle the work now, you know someone else in your profession who could. Make sure that you introduce the prospect to your collaborator, and ask to stay involved with the progress. The impression you will make on both the source of the referral and the prospect will help you in the long-run. Also, your collaborator will likely remember you when they’re experiencing overflow and want to refer work to you.

• Prevent Back-flow: Back-flow occurs when there’s a drop of pressure and contaminated water begins to flow from the ground or a storage system into the clean water system of the building or water supply. In plumbing, there are devices known as “check valves” which prevent this from happening. Artie thought that if he stopped the flow of referrals at the source, (i.e. if he quit) , it would provide him with the breathing room he needed to catch up. Then he, said, he can go back to networking. I told him he was actually creating back-flow. In Networking, negative word-of-mouth results in back-flow. Too often this will occur when someone takes on a job that they cannot handle, causing problems, delays, and headaches, resulting in ill-will for all involved. It also occurs when people are perceiving that the person only cares about themselves. In Artie’s case, he got a lot of referrals and the people in his networking group saw his quitting as giving up on them. They became “contaminated” with the notion that all Artie wanted was to take from the table and give anything in return. I suggested that one way he could install a “check valve” to prevent the back-flow was to give referrals to others and to introduce them to potential referral partners and sources for their respective businesses.

The Butterfly Effect: In Action

 I am pleased to be able to re-print the following article testifying to the benefits of building relationships to help grow your business. LuAnn is a collegue of mine in BNI, the world’s largest networking organization. I hope you enjoy reading her story and it inspires you to extend your hand and welcome new business relationships.

The Butterfly Effect As Reflected in My BNI Story

By LuAnn Buechler

Have you heard of the Butterfly Effect, and how one thing leads to another in the world of referrals? Well here is my BNI Story, a perfect example of the Butterfly Effect in action.

I was invited to BNI by a young man that grew up in my neighborhood and played with my little brother. His name is Craig Oslund. Craig and I got reacquainted at a Chamber After Hours event where I was promoting my new business in 2005. He invited me to visit his BNI meeting. I jumped at the chance to network with another group of professionals. I joined immediately and became the education coordinator the second week of my membership. After all teaching others is a great way to learn the organization for yourself; and it worked.

I fell in love with the organization and its philosophy of Givers Gain. The more I learned, the more I knew I was in it for the long term. So, I set my sights on becoming a BNI Director. A mere inquiry made to Sue Henry, Area Director, in Southern Minnesota about just what it would take to get there put me on the fast track to become a BNI Director within a year of joining.

This of course, allowed me the opportunity to meet Nancy Giacomuzzi, Executive Director of BNI Minnesota, among many other amazing people. Beth Anderson, who you may have read about in another story we wrote regarding visibility, credibility, and profitability was just one of those people. As I gained visibility in the organization and worked with other directors in the region we gained credibility with one another, only to realize after four years that we had complimentary skills and similar goals. Beth and I are now partners in creating networking events.

It was Nancy G. however, who made the most significant impact on my butterfly spreading its wings. In recognition of a job well done, I was given the honor of picking up Dr. Ivan Misner, Founder and Chairman of the Board for BNI, at the airport on a visit to Minnesota. I was to get him checked in at the hotel and bring him over to the party at Nancy’s house promptly at 6pm. This gave us over an hour of free time to get to know each other before the party. Being the man that he is, he asked me all about my business and what a good referral is for me. Nearly a year later, I received a referral from him to the Transformational Leadership Council; the most amazing organization of transformational leaders and fascinating people, for whom I have the privilege of working with on their annual events.

Strengthening the relationship and gaining credibility with Dr. Misner through these events, coupled with the strong relationship he already had with Beth Anderson, allowed us to ask him to participate in and support our International Networking Conference. PMC Events, Get Connected Conferences are now a strategic partner of BNI, which has created the mutually beneficial relationship Ivan speaks of as profitability.

Dr. Misner since then has introduced several TLC Members to BNI as keynote speakers for our director conferences. From this we struck up a strategic partnership with Lisa Nichols, the bestselling author of “No Matter What”. Having built credibility through both the organizations and these relationships, we were able to create a Get Connected Conference in Minneapolis that featured three TLC members along with Lisa Nichols. It was an extraordinary day of education and inspiration.

At our first annual International Networking Conference: Get Connected 2009, I was able to spend time with another BNI Director and author of “Remember the Ice and other Paradigm Shifts”; Bob Nicoll, with whom, I am now co-authoring a book on customer service using empowering word choice. He and six other speakers from that Get Connected Conference approached me at the 2009 International BNI Conference, with a proposal to help manage seminars for them all over the country to help increase their exposure. Yet, another mutually beneficial relationship that grew out of networking and supporting one another.

The butterfly effect from building these relationships through networking exposure continues to amaze me. The process has moved my career along exponentially, expanding my reach beyond my wildest dreams. Yet, the simplest of connections that I make every day, from which who knows what maybe the long lasting implications for others, continue to drive me and excite me. It even gives me goose bumps when I know that the people I have connected are destined to do great things together.

And it’s all because Craig Oslund invited me to a BNI Meeting in September of 2005. Today, Craig is a BNI Ambassador on my team here in Southern Minnesota supporting the overall growth of BNI in everything he does every day; truly living the Givers Gain philosophy as Dr. Misner, our leader does.

What is your butterfly effect? What allowed you to get where you are right now, today? Think about it.

If you wish to expand your network and exponentially grow your business relationships, check out http://www.GetConnected2010.com. Get Connected to the Butterfly Effect that will fulfill your destiny……

Get Connected 2010, International Networking Conference is presented by PMC Events.

LuAnn Buechler is an Assistant Director for Southern Minnesota BNI and operates her own business as a Professional Meeting Consultant providing business education, consulting and meeting planning services. LuAnn has a 25 year history in the Hospitality Industry working for companies such as Hyatt Hotels, Marriott and the Mayo Clinic. LuAnn, is also an Adjunct Professor at the University of Wisconsin Stout. LuAnn got her business started by joining BNI and knew immediately that word-of-mouth marketing was the way to grow her business. Other than a website, it is the only way she chooses to market her business and her key to success is…Relationships, Relationships, Relationships!

LuAnn presents on her personal experiences, and training through BNI that has helped her to become a successful entrepreneur in her own right.

If you enjoyed LuAnn’s success story, follow the link below and leave her a comment on her Ezine Articles page.

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Doing Business With People You Know, Like and Trust

Some people wonder why certain businesses are barely hanging on by a thread while other businesses are prospering. It’s all about the relationships you create that will help you build your business and the commitment to those relationships will help your business excel even during economic turmoil.

You hear it all the time, “I don’t have time to join that networking group” or “The Chamber never seems to work for me” or better yet “That’s just another social club wanting money.”

Madison, Alabama BNI Networkers

Being involved in networking organizations will help you build your base of contacts, but it will never turn those contacts into contracts without you making the effort to build on the relationships you encounter at the networking events. Networking events provide you with the arena to get to know, like and trust fellow networkers.

What does it take to build a relationship? How about your personal relationship…..have you ever been in a personal relationship and you showed up when you felt like it, brought nothing to the relationship, just showed up for a free meal, or better yet made the date but then had nothing to contribute to the conversation? And how did that work out for you?

Building profitable relationships in networking is much like building a personal relationship. You must be willing to be honest, caring, and giving and have no expectations for a return on your investment. Once people realize you are participating with no agenda, they will begin to build trust with you. They will be open to your ideas and your purpose for the relationship.

Participating in a Chamber of Commerce networking event most definitely does work, but you have to realize that you can’t go to the event with the intention of “getting business.” If you are honest with yourself and go to the Chamber event to build relationships and get some visibility for yourself and your business, the people will begin to like you. It will become evident that you are there to help others, not take from them. The more people see you, they more they being to trust you…..especially if you are seen with people they already trust.

Once you have created an opportunity for event participants to like you and trust you, they will begin to want to do business with you. Why? People want to do business with people they know, like and trust. It’s really just a common sense practice if you think about it. Why would you ever go to the internet to google a carpet cleaner when you have began to build a relationship with the local carpet cleaner that attends many of the same networking events that you do? You wouldn’t!

Now that you have seen the carpet cleaner on several occasions and been introduced to them by a mutual friend, and had the opportunity to get to know them in a “non-sales environment” you have been afforded the opportunity to begin building a relationship that will build your trust for them and their business.

Networking creates opportunities to begin fostering business relationships. And, that’s why you need to attend them…..not to hand out hundreds of business cards and beg for their business. But remember, building a relationship takes time, so don’t attend expectation immediate results or you will leave saying, “Those Chamber events never work.”

So, the next time you think that attending a networking event is not worth your time, think about the potential business relationships that you are about to cheat yourself from. And then, go ahead, go home and google a stranger to do business with!

Once again, how’s that working out for you?

BNIConnect: Changing The Way The World Does Business

Just a little over a year ago, BNIConnect was an action plan, and now, it’s a plan in action.

In March 2009, the United Arab Emirates was the first region in the world to roll out the BNIConnect project. And, now as regions, one by one, begin to launch the project, we are in essence just in the countdown phase of BNI’s entire organization operating under one roof….all with the same tools and all teaching the same consistent message……exemplifying the true meaning of “Givers Gain” in referral based marketing. Once again, an example of how BNI is truly changing the way the world does business!

“My marching orders to directors around the world this year are to focus on the fundamentals. Get back to basics. Do what BNI does well and do it better than we have ever done it before. We are committed to making BNI an even better organization in 2009.”

It was almost a year ago that Dr. Ivan Misner delivered these words to his team of BNI members and directors in Orlando, Florida at the 2008 National Director’s Conference. Dr. Misner pointed out that it was focusing on the “basics” of networking that has driven BNI to become the world’s powerhouse in referral-based marketing. And, now…..we’re “Raising The Bar in 2009.”

Beth Anderson, project manager for BNIConnect, is working closely with Dr. Misner and his team to ensure that all BNI members have the opportunity to experience the grassroots essence of participating in a worldwide networking organization. Even though regions may be separated by vast miles, various business scopes and even speak different languages, BNIConnect will allow a more solid infrastructure for the franchise owners of BNI as well as for it’s members globally.

Dr. Ivan Misner & Beth M. Anderson

“With just over 110,000 members, BNIConnect will now be able to bring its members onto a new plateau for referral marketing,” Anderson said. “Members can modify directory listings and interact with other members around the world. From podcasts, to blogs to focus groups, BNIConnect will allow BNI’s members to equally participate and network, no matter where you are located in the world. This project will exemplify that we really are a worldwide organization with its member’s best interest in hand.”

If you’re a member of Linked In, Facebook or any other social media organization, you have probably experienced how easy it is to keep in touch with people that you haven’t seen or heard from in years. From old friends you went to high school with, to family members you almost forgot you had, these social venues are allowing relationships to rekindle with the touch of a keypad. And now, BNIConnect is going to allow you to revisit old friendships and build new relationships around the world in a business environment!

Bijay Shah, National Director for the Middle East and Executive Director for the United Arab Emirates said, “We’re certainly very excited! The UAE is considered to be highly technologically advanced in all aspects of business and global trade – it fits in perfectly well with this trend. Our members have been waiting for this for a very long time. We’ve delivered and are getting great feedback already!”

Unlike most social networks, which is open to anyone who wants to join, BNIConnect will bring together tens of thousands of active BNI members who all agree to and abide by the BNI Code of Ethics and who understand and practice the fruits of Givers Gain…..making your membership even more valuable. BNIConnect is a tool by which you can pass referrals not only across the room…..but across the world!

“Most of our members are savvy when it comes to online networking. They see this as a fantastic tool to connect with BNI members globally. They already use Ecademy, Linked-in, Xing, Facebook and Twitter and they see BNIConnect making the common connection across the board when it comes to BNI focused online networking,” Shah pointed out. “Furthermore, 100% of our members are nationals of other countries (as are 90% of the residents of the UAE) and they tend to travel frequently. The ability to connect with BNI members through BNIConnect will encourage them more to visit BNI Chapters in other parts of the world. Popular BNI regions are the United Kingdom, Germany, USA, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, India and South Africa. There is plenty of 2-way traffic between these countries – we receive at least 1-2 visitors weekly from these countries who are BNI members and visiting the UAE,” Shah continued.

BNIConnect will allow members to build a team of like-minded professionals and create a “group” (online Power Team) within BNI’s web-based system. Imagine what it will be like to be a florist in Huntsville, Alabama (like I am)  and having the opportunity to join other florists from BNI chapters around the world to discuss industry trends or how we are making our membership in BNI more successful. On the other side of the coin, a member that receives an engagement ring can soon join the “Wedding Mafia Group” on BNIConnect and gather ideas and suggestions from some of the best wedding professionals globally. Would this make your membership even more valuable? Having an international focus group at your fingertips is priceless.

“We’re taking the four walls of your chapter meeting down by showing the world that there’s more to BNI than the BNI chapter,” Anderson said. “Potential applicants will now be able to access an application online to expedite the application process. Interest parties for core groups will soon be able to view videos, sign up to receive email alerts, gather chapter information, and search category availabilities for any chapter in the world.”

Dr. Misner points out that BNIConnect is not taking the place of BNI’s weekly, face-to-face meetings, but yet, it is complimenting the meeting with an opportunity to connect to members outside of the meeting which will enhance the benefits of cross-chapter relationships.

Get connected with BNIConnect. Coming to your BNI region soon!

Three Deadly Mistakes To Avoid At A Networking Event

Rarely a week goes by that I don’t receive an invitation to attend a networking event. No matter what city I’m working in, it always seems that something is going on in the networking world…..too great to be missed!

Visibility is one of the first steps in building a concrete relationship for growing your business. But, you must take every effort to ensure that the visibility you are receiving is positive. From your body language, to your personal actions, you are being judged from people throughout the room. Some of the people you may not need to know today, but tomorrow they may be the decision maker on a proposal you are hoping to land!

Without the proper visibility techniques, you will never be able to make it to the credibility phase of developing a relationship. Dr. Ivan Misner, founder of BNI, teaches that you must first create visibility and then establish credibility to eventually experience profitability. And, we all know, that profitability is the ultimate goal of us attending any networking event…..right?

So, I’d like to point out three deadly mistakes you should always avoid when attending a networking event if you want positive visibility and credibility.

Be Selective Of The Company You Keep

Brian Tracy, renowned author, tells us that you are the average of the five people you are associated with the most.

I’d like to suggest that you are careful of whom you associate with when you are at a networking event. A person may be a lot of fun at the corner pub, but can be detrimental to your success at a networking event. I’m not advocating giving anyone the “cold shoulder,” but you should always be conscious of the drama that tends to follow certain people and avoid spending an extended amount of time with them.

Remember, the goal to attending a networking event is to build relationships not destroy them.

Watch Your Liquor Consumption…..Name Your Poison

Recently, a local networker was seen at a community networking event with “a drink in both hands.”  Wow, wouldn’t you love to be the one that everyone notices with “a drink in both hands?”  What were they thinking?  Was it last call or something?

Social drinking is obviously acceptable, but you must, you must, you MUST know when to say WHEN. Once again, you are networking to building relationships, not poison them.

nImAdestiny's photostream

Even if you’ve had a rough day or even a rough week, you can’t turn to the local networking event to numb your personal problems. If your week has been that bad……GO HOME! Remember, you will never get to the credibility phase with others if your visibility is sloshed!

Avoid Gossip At All Costs

I say to avoid gossip at all costs because that’s exactly what it will be…..it will cost you business in the end. You must realize that even though most networking events are loud and noisy, people still overhear conversations. If someone hears you gossiping about someone else, they will first feel uncomfortable and not want to be in the circle with you and secondly, they will usually distance themselves from you at future events.

Remember, that the only people who are interested in your gossip are those who are helping you spread it. Everyone else sees gossip for exactly what it is…..an act to destroy relationships and build animosity.

So, the next time you’re at an event, take a look around and notice the groups of people networking. Notice how their body language is expressing a positive action to build visibility. Take note at who they are networking with…..and realize how quickly they are building credibility among their peers.

 And then, notice those who are obviously there to partake in libations and gossip and talk about how people don’t treat them fairly.

Is it any wonder those networkers never make it to profitability?

Learn To NETwork The Room With A “Cordial Smile”

We’ve all heard the saying “actions speak louder than words.” And, most of know it’s really the truth, but why don’t more of us spend time trying to learn the meanings behind “actions.”

A great outlet to market your business is attending networking events. But, you need to know how to get the best out of one of these events for it to be worth your while. Learning how to read the actions of fellow networkers could mean the difference in you landing that big deal you’ve been working on…..or losing it! And, just as important, is the message your body language is projecting to everyone at the event.

In a previous article I spoke about the importance of possessing a genuine smile while networking. Let’s take a look at another type of smile you may encounter from time to time. I like to call this the “cordial smile.” This is the smile that you put on when you are “on stage.” Just as if you were to paint it on like putting on stage make-up, you know exactly when to put this smile on and when you can safely take it off. Putting on the cordial smile is no different than putting on your best suit when preparing for a social event. You want to look your best and give the best impression you can…..and your cordial smile is just part of the uniform for the event.

The cordial smile usually will not involve the eyes as much as the “genuine smile” does and it rarely creates the “crow’s feet” wrinkles at the eyes as the genuine smile. Usually the person will only slightly be showing their teeth in the smile as well. The message being given is that you are approachable. And, more importantly, you want to approach others and the smile is asking for their permission to enter their space. The genuine smile shows more confidence in you; the cordial smile is a bit more reserved, but just as meaningful.

What I find important about the cordial smile is actually the lack of it. That’s right. The lack of your cordial smile is what you should be aware of when meeting someone in a networking or social environment. If you want to entice more referrals for marketing your book, you must understand that it’s your smile that first attracts attention to you.

It is of the utmost importance to be on your best behavior when you are attending a networking event. After all, what’s the point of networking if you aren’t going to be making the best impression you possibly can make. We all have experienced bad days, have had a headache, or just received a speeding ticket on the way to an event. But one thing I have found is that half of the people you meet don’t care about your troubles of the day, and the other half are just glad your day was worse than theirs!

You should be aware that many impressions you make are made from a distance. The brain actually records and deciphers a smile from afar before any other form of body language. You may only meet 10 or 15 people at your next networking event, but that doesn’t mean that 30, 40 or even 50 people aren’t noticing you as you work the room…..especially if you have your “cordial smile” on for the evening.

If you are lacking either the genuine smile or the cordial smile, then you are sending the message to everyone that you really are not approachable. Even if you make the first move to meet someone, they probably won’t be very receptive to you because of the lack of a friendly face. When you smile, you are sending a message that you are happy, that life is good.  And, when you are not smiling, your body language is telling everyone that you have other things on your mind. No one enjoys being around unhappy people. So, they tend to avoid networkers who lack a smile.

So the next time you are getting ready to attend your special event, take a brief moment before you get out of your car…..look in the rear view mirror, paint that smile on your face and say to yourself, “wow I look good.” And, you will!

Give The Gift Of A Genuine Smile While Networking

At the next networking event you attend, I’d like to challenge you to give a gift to as many people as you possibly can while in attendance. It doesn’t have to be wrapped in fancy paper or even have a pretty bow. All you need is to offer each person you meet the gift of your “genuine” smile.

Many studies have been written regarding our smiles, but how powerful will it be when you consider your smile as a small gift to everyone you come into contact with at your next networking event. And, more importantly, they will realize it was a gift as well.

We’ve all been in situations where we were looking at someone while attending a meeting, or even walking down the street. When they made eye contact with us, we would immediately look away, right?  We didn’t want them knowing we were looking at them. Why not?

Next time you make eye contact with someone, even if you don’t know them, offer them the gift of a genuine smile and see what their reaction is. I’m willing to bet, they will return the gift! If the situation is right, that small gesture usually creates an opportunity for you to introduce yourself. After all, isn’t that why you are attending networking events…..to meet people you don’t already know?

 I’d like to offer you a few tips to ensure that you are sending the “right” message, however.  The smile is one of the easiest forms of body language to interpret. So, be fully aware that your smile MUST be genuine.

Actually, think about some of the smiles that you have received lately. When someone flashes a quick smile, the message they are sending is that they are acknowledging you, but they are too busy to offer a genuine smile because that may lead into a conversation. So, if someone flashes you the quick smile…..smile back and keep moving. They probably aren’t open to having a conversation at the moment.

Then, there is a more genuine smile that takes a second or two to be communicated. Watch the eyes…..first they will raise their eyebrows. After they begin the smile with their eyes, their lips will follow the eyebrows and turn upward as well. A genuine smile is an invitation to say “hello.”  Now, you can smile back and offer a handshake. 

The first step in communication is in the eyes. The handshake is the first step to building a relationship.